"I haven't had that much fun in a long time!"

I've been sleeping on my squeaky old futon for the past few months since I left Joe and moved back in with my parents.

Due to the limited size of my room and the limited size of my current budget, I haven't purchased a queen-sized mattress yet, even though I have a really nice bedroom set stored away.

In any case, I don't often open the futon to its "bed" position, partly because there's no room with the layout of my furniture now, and partly because it's more comfortable to sleep on it as a couch.

Now here's what I'm getting at: as a couch, there is a much smaller amount of area on which to sit, lie, or rest something, since half of the mattress is vertical. On the nights that I do decide to watch television before I go to bed, or to help me fall asleep, I can never find the remote. I know it's on the futon somewhere, but it always takes me at least three full minutes to find it, despite the small area that it could potentially be in. I really don't understand how that works, physically.

...
Last Thursday, the 22nd, was Lindsey's birthday. Eight of us got together (Lindsey, Albert, Peter, Lianna, Matt, AJ, Justin and I) in three cars to go out to her favorite Vietnamese restaurant, and we had a great time. Since we don't normally dress formally (or even semi-formally), we girls decided to fancy it up, and let me tell you...

...I looked HOT. I'm not conceited, or pompous, and I don't think extremely highly of myself, but I looked great. I wore a black dress, ruched at the top, very form-fitting, and banded at the bottom so it clung to every curve and my legs, as well. Paired with cute black heels with bows, it was gorgeous.

I drove my car to get Lindsey and Albert, then we went to pick up Justin and AJ before heading out. The two boys (since I was driving) only saw me from the waist up while I was in the car, but when I got out I saw the look on their faces and it was then that I gained a personal victory.

It didn't last long, however. The victory, I mean. We left the restaurant with the intention of quickly hitting up the liquor store to buy supplies for the karaoke we had decided to do later, since we would be renting a private room and outside drinks were allowed.

As soon as we got the room I started drinking the ciders that Linds and I were supposed to share (it is unlikely that I would be willing to sing karaoke sober). Peter sang Mmmbop first and gave me a pseudo-lap dance (it was hilarious!). Linds was up next with the infamous Spears' Oops! I Did It Again. By my first song I had finished three ciders and started drinking the bottle of Van Gogh espresso vodka that Justin bought, and was tanked.

There was much dancing and celebrating on my part, and Linds even acquired a picture that pretty much summed up my night: me dancing, my head back, and holding the bottle of vodka.

Now here are the two major problems with Van Gogh espresso vodka: 1) it's vodka, and vodka fucks me up; 2) it's espresso flavored, which makes it taste more like coffee and less like vodka for easy consumption.

After one or two or six swigs my body temperature and the room temperature (which had been uncomfortably warm anyway) were both rising, and the rotating mini-disco ball and the tacky floral wallpaper started to spin around me.

I left to evacuate the contents of my stomach into the restroom, and right around that point I decided that I had way too much to drink and should probably stop. As soon as I left the bathroom I ran into AJ, who had come to check on me (so much for keeping the vomiting on the sly, Sarah).

I went back to the room only to find that if I stayed there I would become sick again, so I went outside for some fresh air and propped myself on my car. AJ had followed to "see if I was okay" (smoke a cigarette) and Linds came out, asked if I was okay, then apparently from the look on my face decided that it was time to pack it up.

She went inside to tell everyone we were leaving, followed by AJ who began cleaning all the bottles and whatnot from the room, but Linds was convinced to sit down for another song or two, leaving me outside alone.

When she came back out I had relocated from propped on my car to sitting down on the sidewalk with my head hanging in a foot to foot-and-a-half alley between the karaoke building and the building next door.

And this is why I love Lindsey: she freaked out on Justin (who had, I assume, been the one to convince her to chill for a few minutes before we left) for my sake. "Look!" she screamed. "This is why I wanted to go right away! My best friend is sitting on the sidewalk, wasted, with her head in a fucking alley!"

In all reality I would have been fine, provided someone sat with me to make sure I wasn't abducted or something else heinous like that. I really didn't want a crowd, I don't like drama.

We all manage to get me into the backseat of my car, which Albert has decided to drive home, and I look like a mess, I'm sure. There goes my attempt to look hot to impress the boys.

I crashed on Albert's couch, and in the morning sent a clumsy text message to AJ apologizing for my wobbly drunkenness (as I do not normally drink that much), and also for kind of looking after me.

Then I was informed by Lindsey that AJ really didn't do much at all. He did initially check on me (smoked a cigarette), but then when he went inside to clear the room, Justin is the one who came out, sat next to me on the sidewalk, kept talking to me to keep me awake, helped me into the car, and let me put my head on his shoulder to sleep on the ride home.

Now I feel like an asshole. Justin also spotted me $20 for my portion of the karaoke fees and allowed me to drink nearly half of his bottle of vodka.

Almost all of this information is second-hand, but considering the source, I would say that it is all fairly accurate.

I am embarrassed that I made such a fool of myself, which I tend to do anyway, but in particular for two reasons: I feel like I caused an early end to Lindsey's birthday, which in turn ruined the night. She swears it was the best birthday she's had in years, since I guess she doesn't normally celebrate her birthday. I will say that before the me being sick incident, I had a blast. The night was awesome.

Also, I am embarrassed that I gave credit to AJ for taking care of me when clearly he did not do much, and I think I did because I had wanted it to be him. I am also embarrassed that anyone there had to see that at all, particularly AJ, which is namely the person I had been most trying to impress.

Lindsey did tell me, however, that in spite of the probably obligatory efforts to ensure my welfare, Justin had said several times on the way back home, "Tonight was awesome, I haven't had that much fun in a long time!" (and several variations of that phrase).

Overall: Not a bust.
But I'll probably cut back on the drinking.